It's been a weekend to remember but also full of changes that have left me at the end of it feeling a strange mixture of happy yet sad and just generally emotionally overwhelmed.
Something I've been thinking about amidst all of this is how emotionally drained and overloaded I tend to feel when grappling with changes or just dealing with too much at once and facing uncertianty regarding the future. Okay, a lot of it may come down to introvertedness and being a fairly sensitive person, but more recently I've been wondering how much of it actually comes down to my trust in God (or lack of it).
You see, how can I be truly happy and content with what is happening in my life, the good and the bad, if I am constantly worrying about how things will end up and feeling the need to be totally in control of it all? How can I trust others, let alone myself, when I can't even trust that God already has my future in His hands? It's a recipe for disaster and frustration at both myself and others as well as the Lord when things don't go the way I want or when I simply can't accept how He is working in my life and the lives of others!
Don't get me wrong: it's okay to be more sensitive than the average person and to feel emotions deeply. Its okay to have crying or laughing sessions when trying to adjust to different circumstances or changes in my life. After all, there are blessings in these things too: for one thing being this way has helped me many a time to realize when others may be feeling that way too and need a bit of encouragement. But I've been learning that problems come when I let those emotions be in control and grip me, filling me with fear and a mistrust in the Lord and that He is control and holds the future in His hands.
Reader, are you, like me in the process of growing up and struggling to emotionally adjust to changes in your life? Maybe you too want to be in control of it all and don't trust that the Lord already knows what is ahead? I don't pretend to have all the answers or even many Bible verses to share but I am reminded of my favourite one:
"Rejoice in the Lord always; again I will say, rejoice. Let your reasonableness be known to everyone. The Lord is at hand; do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus." ~ Philippians 4:4-7
Praying that you too are able to continue to trust in Him no matter how you feel or what your emotions tell you!